A Love Letter to Finding Friends in College

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Cal State Chico chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

In high school, I never expected to find close friends in college. I always considered myself to be more reserved and shy when it came to making friends. I wasn’t someone who had a big friend group in the past, but I valued my few close hometown friends. Growing up in one place, I found it difficult to meet new people. Arriving at Chico State, eight hours from home, was both scary and freeing. It was my chance for a fresh start, and trusting the process proved worthwhile. Here’s how my college experience helped me meet the people who became my lifelong friends.

Finding friends in college was a challenge. My first semester as a Freshman was lonely; I only formed surface-level connections and often ate alone in the dining hall. Realizing I needed to change, I committed to making my college experience better.

I started to boost my confidence when I talked to new people. In my head, I kept telling myself to “fake it until you make it.” I started saying yes to everything: spontaneous hangouts, birthday party invites, and talking to people in my classes. The more I interacted with people, the more I felt confident in myself. Slowly but surely, I was finding people who matched my personality and values.

Everything truly started to change towards the end of freshman year. I met my best friends by living on the same dorm floor and through mutual friends. I finally found a group of people where I could be unapologetically myself. There was no judgment or toxicity, just pure support and friendship. Before I knew it, I had a group of lifelong friends with whom we did everything together. Some of my favorite memories in college have been watching movies together or having game nights. I finally felt settled into my new life here at Chico State. Now, as a senior, I have had the same friend group for the past 3 years. Looking back, I realized that finding your people takes time, patience, and vulnerability. I would not have traded anything that I did, because it all led me to where I was supposed to be.

If you are still wondering when you will meet your people, don’t worry, because you are not alone. One piece of advice that I can give is that it takes time and patience. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and step out of your comfort zone. Talk to people in your classes, join clubs, and say yes to hangouts. Simply putting yourself out there could lead to a lifelong friendship when you least expect it. If you are still searching, just know your people are out there. It might not happen right away, but when it does, it’ll be worth the wait. Trust the process; you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.