Shonda Rhimes opens up about past health struggles and how she thought she’d be dead by now

Grey’s Anatomy creator Shonda Rhimes has admitted that she once feared her life would be cut short if she didn’t make significant lifestyle changes.

The award-winning television producer and screenwriter, 55, previously opened up about being overweight in her 2015 memoir, Year of Yes, and how having young children made her realize she needed to lose weight if she wanted to remain healthy and alive.

During a recent conversation with Good Morning America co-anchor Robin Roberts at an event at New York City’s 92Y, the mother of three was reminded of a passage in her book, in which she detailed being brought to tears after running around with her daughter.

“There’s a time that you couldn’t do that,” Roberts said, per People, with Rhimes responding in agreement. “I have little kids, guys and I really thought like I might be dead in 10 years,” the Bridgerton and Scandal creator explained. “Like that’s how bad I felt. And I couldn't, I couldn’t put my 20-pound kid on my shoulders and run around, which I should have been able to do.”

Rhimes, who is mother to daughters Harper, 22, Emerson, 12, and Beckett, 11, added: “And so when that moment happened, when I could do that, it was such a moment of both relief and revelation for me that it’s one of those memories I’ll take with me forever.

“Having done it and feeling like, ‘Oh my God, I feel myself again,’” she added.

Rhimes further described her unhealthy relationship with food, revealing her mantra used to be: “My body is just a container for my brain.

“At a certain point I started to feel like truly feel terrible. Like have a hard time going up the stairs, getting breathless all the time,” she told Roberts and the audience. “I developed sleep apnea and I like woke up all the time, choking in, in my sleep. Like I started to feel awful and I was like, I have to do something about this.”

In Year of Yes, Rhimes wrote that she had lost 117 pounds. At the time, she explained her weight loss was not about vanity, but about being healthy for her children.

“It was about the fact that I have a 3-year-old and a 2-year-old and a 13-year-old, and I realized that I wanted to be around for them, like be healthy,” she told Ellen DeGeneres in 2015.

Talking to Extra that same year, she shared how she dropped the weight.

“I just changed everything I ate,” she said. “And I hated that, all of that. And I hate exercising and I did that too, and I hated that the whole time. I still hate it. I hate every minute of every bit of it.”

She clarified that she doesn’t restrict what she eats, but makes sure to enjoy everything in moderation.

“I actually eat everything I want to eat. But I try to make it like, much less, and little, smaller portions. But what’s happened is, is that you change what your palate was. Like suddenly, now I’m craving fish and salad,” Rhimes said. “Now I have a lot of extra energy and I feel much better.”