3 Things Nobody Tells You About Your Freshman Year — Advice From a College Senior

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Conn chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

As a 21-year-old senior starting my last year of college here at the University of Connecticut, I feel like I’ve lived through enough experiences to give younger college students some crucial pieces of advice. Trust me, the transition into college isn’t easy, and I feel like the mental and emotional challenges associated with it just aren’t talked about enough. I wish I’d had someone who had been honest with me when I was just an 18-year-old high school graduate with the whole world of UConn as her oyster. If you feel like you’re in the dark or anxious about this transition, I’m here to be your big sister and give you some advice that I wish I’d known myself four years ago.

Embrace the loneliness!

Now I know this might seem counterintuitive. Isn’t college all about getting out of your shell and meeting your forever people? Yes! But with this being said, it’s just as important to prioritize yourself, and realize that the only person who’s always going to be there for you 100 percent of the time is you. It’s hard to try to always be coordinating your schedules with your friends and peers, and rather than avoiding doing anything in solitude, embrace it! Let yourself get into your very own routine, and then, when it’s convenient for other people to become involved, welcome them in. You’ll see pretty quickly that once you start putting yourself first, and becoming comfortable with spending time with yourself, you’ll have way more energy to put out into your developing relationships. I read something once that has stuck with me ever since: “Fill your own cup, and let them fall in love with the overflow.” Basically, take care of yourself first and watch how many more people you attract!

Lean into the growing pains

For most of us, moving away from home and to a brand-new place where we don’t know anyone is probably the biggest change we’ve ever experienced in our lives. As scary as it can be, and as big of an adjustment as it is that we have to make, I wish someone had told me to just go with the flow!

• The nights where you just want to be home

• The longing for home-cooked meals

• The knowing that you’re supposed to be meeting new people while feeling paralyzed by nerves

It’s all just teaching you more and more about who you are. I genuinely feel like I learned more about myself as a person in my first two years of college than I ever have in my life. You will start to learn what you value, what’s important to you in friendships and relationships, how you best manage your time — the list goes on and on. Lean into those growing pains and know that you’ll come out on the other side of all of these challenges and changes as a way stronger person.

The first people you meet don’t have to be your best friends forever

More often than not, the girls I saw grouped up the first couple of months during my time here at UConn don’t even run in the same circles anymore. It’s important to realize that it’s completely okay to outgrow friendships. Like I mentioned earlier, you learn so much about yourself during your time as a college student, so sometimes the person you were during move-in weekend doesn’t fit into the same groups as the more seasoned and mature college senior version of yourself does. It’s better to understand this early on, and expect to have some changing relationships, rather than force yourself to get along with people you may start to outgrow. College gets busy! So why force yourself to waste energy on relationships that no longer serve you? I feel like this quote summarizes this concept perfectly.

“The woman you are becoming will cost you people, relationships, and comfort zones. Choose her anyway. Your future self is worth every sacrifice.”

In Conclusion,

As my time at UConn comes to a close, I can’t help but reflect on everything I’ve learned here. To be completely honest, when I see college freshmen, I almost feel a little jealous of all of the self-reflection and learning they have ahead of them. I think it is so exciting to really find yourself, sometimes for the first time. So, from a UConn senior, best of luck! And remember that all of the changes are part of the process, and you will come out on the other side a better person!